I Remember Every Time You Have Killed Me

I keep surprising myself by thinking that I can’t scrape any further down, yet week in, week out, I seem to manage to find a way to feel worse about myself. At least I got upset enough today to be able to channel something.

Rings x2, Warps, Braids, Plaits, Ripples, Blinds, Marbles, Stages and Peaks with QR2, 3 Sisters, uVCF and Batumi.



Thank you for continuing to share both your thoughts and your sounds. I am sorry to hear of the struggles you currently face.

Your work moves and inspires me. For that, I send my deepest appreciation.


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That was a perfect trippy jam.

It’s really beautiful !
Would you mind giving details on your setup ?

I feel truly sorry for your mind. You got to find help, dear, you can’t just keep degrading till it’s too late !

Thank you for the kind words and taking the time to listen, it means the world to me. I’m sorry it’s taken me a while to respond.

@LyingDalai, my setup is something along the lines of the following cases

Along with a beatstep pro, microbrute and roland sh01a. I send the various parts out, straight into a behringer 1402 mixer with strymon bluesky and el cap pedals on its busses and then record to an ancient but still working perfectly zoon h4 recorder.

I see my doctor again this week so think I’ll ask her to change my meds as they’re not really stopping me from feeling like a collapsing black hole.

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Hi Erstlaub, this track is lovely and inspires in me the same feelings as when listening to Stars of the Lid, great to immerse yourself in…

Hope you get yourself on an even keel soon.

Do tell your doc. I changed mine after 1.5 years of just numbness but no progress and now within 6 months I feel pretty normal and functioning again.

Best luck David. Your music output is still #goals !!

S x

If your doc is a GP see about finding a specialist

Hi Erstlaub…how can i make the same Main virtual rack you did…I can get it at Modulargrid?..how that please?thks!